Burger Wars Episode LXXXVII: A Chelsea Local [BurgeReview]

Oh, get the swordfish. Best swordfish in the city. The best, Jerry

Kenny Bania (Seinfeld episode “The Soup”)

The other day we ended in The Phene, a lovely venue in Chelsea with multiple spaces, including a pub style bar, a nice conservatory dinning room, a private dinner first floor space, and finally an amazing beer garden.

Time to eat

We got the salt and Schezuan pepper squid for starter, really nice good heat. Also the gazpacho, texture was a bit odd but good flavours.

Squid

My partner in crime got a beautiful swordfish, great flavours, perfectly cooked, really nice execution. I decided to go for the Phene Burger.

Burger Time

An Angus beef burger, Blacksticks blue cheese, bacon, and chili jam.

The verdict, the burger didn’t stand the expectations. The patty was completely overdone, they mentioned they cook them medium, but it was well done, completely dry. The bacon addition was nice, the cheese was missing in action.

The damage, 18 quid for the burger and fries adding the blue cheese and bacon

The conclusion, the burger was a disaster, such a shame as the rest of the food was quite nice. It might have been a bad day, I would stay away from the burger, just go for whatever else is in the menu. I will have to give them a poor 5 over 10 just for the bacon that was meaty and lovely addition otherwise could have been a 3.

The Phene

T: 020 7352 9898

European Cuisine

Approx Damage: £40pp

Area: Chelsea

Borough: Kensington & Chelsea

Twitter: The PheneSW3

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High cotton [On The Road: Charleston]

Nice fine period décor  antique chandeliers with the southern touch of ceiling fans. Live jazz in the bar gave an unique atmosphere to High Cotton. Part of the Maverick Southern Kitchen group, yes the same ones from SNOB. The proposal just local ingredients and southern hospitality. 

The place

Décor

I started the night with creamy mushroom soup with truffle oil, and a touch of chives. It was nice, creamy texture, great aroma, but a little bit bland. 

Mushroom soup

Moving on I got crispy pork belly with beet reduction frisée caramelized apples, in a sauce gribiche. The dish was awesome the sweetness of the beet reduction and the apples with the bitterness of the greens and the crispy pork was succulent. Amazing way to play with the five layers of happiness. 

The five layers

My main a grilled local swordfish with roasted cauliflower purée, smash fingerling potatoes, sautéed red pearl onions, and leeks porcini garlic foam. It was ok, the fish perfectly cooked. A little complicated dish, the leeks were a bit too salty but combined with the potatoes and the fish kind of work, the foam was good but overall nothing elevated the fish. 

Swordfish

Finally for desert, Southern style pecan pie with vanilla ice cream, and bourbon brown sugar caramel. It was amazing, even I'm not the sweet tooth kind of guy, the bourbon caramel gave a nice touch 

Pie

Nice place, a few dishes miss the great scoring, but overall a nice diner. The service was extremely nice and helpful. 

Cotton reminds me the Seinfeld episode “The Chaperone” 

Announcer #1: And the Yankees take the field!

Announcer #2: Is it my imagination, or do the Yankees look a little different tonight? I can't put my finger on it

Announcer #1: Well, from what I understand, they've switched to cotton uniforms

Announcer #2: They seem blousier, softer

Announcer #1: Well, it is a natural fibre

High Cotton

T: +1 843 7243815

Southern Cuisine

Approx Damage: $65pp

Area: Peninsular Charleston

Charleston

Twitter: mavkitchens

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Australian Footy and Seafood in Southbank [On The Road: Melbourne]

I was invited by our local colleagues to a game of Australian Football League or Footy, huge event, full house in the Melbourne Cricket Ground, Collingwood vs Hawthorn, an entertaining evening full of beer and meat pies. 

AFL

After the game we decided to go and walk around the Southbank to have a bite. A couple minutes studying our options we went for a good looking place named Waterfront. Seafood place as you might have guessed, owned by the Zampenis family originally from Greece, and al fresco dining on a terrace. 

Southbank

Dinning room

Saw the menu and I went for 14 hour cooked pork belly, seared scallop, soy ginger glaze, and apple puree, sounds good right, well sadly the belly was chewy, on the other hand the scallop was perfectly cooked, overall ok to good. A colleague went for the salt and pepper calamari, and odd greyish colour, nicely battered and good flavour. 

Pork belly

Calamari

For main I went for the swordfish, Queensland tiger prawn, black and white sesame seeds, and Vietnamese salad. I didn’t get the sign from the waitress as I asked what she recommended between the swordfish or the lobster and salmon wellington, she recommended the lobster risotto. Anyway big mistake went for the swordfish and was completely overcooked then it was laying over a bed of cabbage and carrots with no purpouse whatsoever, pretty disappointing. 

Swordfish

So much potential, terrible delivery. 

Greece reminds me the Seinfeld episode “The Bizarro Jerry” 

Jerry: She had man-hands 

Elaine: Man, hands? 

Jerry: The hands of a man. It's like a creature out of Greek Mythology, I mean, she was like part woman, part horrible beast 

Elaine: Would you, prefer it, if she had, no hands at all? 

Jerry: Would she have hooks? 

Elaine: Do uh, do hooks make it more attractive, Jerry?
Jerry: Kind of cool looking

Waterfront

T: +61 3 9886 9766

Seafood

Approx Damage: AU$ 70pp

Neighbourhood: Southbank

Melbourne

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